Life and it’s Opportunities

Isn’t it funny how life can knock you flat on your ass, be so tragic and still expect you to get up and live? I have found most people who wouldn’t and couldn’t understand what you have or are going thru can be no help due to the fact they don’t understand having not gone through it. Now, that doesnt make them bad people, it just means they do the best that they can (and most don’t know what to say to you) and then continue to live their fairly normal lives.

As some of you know, I have had Ra and Fibro for many many years as well as in Stage 4 kidney disease, ( as well with other things)being 46 and having to take the meds I take and seeing Drs weekly sometimes really can suck. In the midst of all this I lost my 19 year old son just 5 1/2 years ago. Our lives came crashing down on us in a way I cant even explain–unless you have felt that loss.

Now this isn’t a post on me– or feel sorry for me–It is about something else–getting back up. My husband, daughter and I struggle with this daily–not only did his death ruin our lives to a point — we have been still—-not able to move–or breathe–happy? what is that?? stunted-tragic..see where I am going with this? We have all made small strides on our journey-but not nearly enough.

I have been a creator on YouTube for the past couple years and I love it. That is MY small step. It gives me something to focus on and all of my wonderful subs- who I call angels-are so loving and supportive and are just plain WONDERFUL!

Now my daughter Emily has started her YouTube journey. I have been telling her for years to make a video, knowing she would love it, and she finally took the plunge! She loves the interaction and sees how wonderful it is to get comments and communicate with others that she wouldn’t have met otherwise. This is a BIG step for her. She was 14 and home alone when the 4 cops came to our door with the news of her brother. We thought she would be stuck at 14 forever, but luckily this past year she learned how to drive-got her license and has been doing a bit more than she ever thought she would or could. Now she has a lot more to go on her journey but her small step is a massive one for us here…and I am so Thankful. WE are so thankful!

I have learned there is no time limit for loss-that you can be stuck for years and years- I have learned that being disabled isnt a death sentence- So many of my angels on youtube write me-scared-stuck-struggling and feeling ashamed of that- I will be writing more about chronic illness and how I deal–or dont deal–with it-as well as about my life and struggles. It is one of my most requested things–more about me and my life and how do i and I want to share my journey with you all!

Thank you for taking the time to read my babble! Below is a list of places you can find me –friend me and follow me!!! I welcome you to do so and I will follow back!!!!!



9 Comments for “Life and it’s Opportunities”

  1. 1Sue heads

    Hey there girl. Just wanted to say…you’re doing great. You get carry on and in the midst of all that terrible pain…you bring joy and solace to others. Its you that is the angel. This may sound a bit dramatic but i was at my wits end, ready to give up. Ready to give in to the pain both mental and physical when i found you on youtube. I thought..theres a REAL person. If she can do it, so can I. So i thank you. From the bottom of my heart i thank you. Stay strong my lovely. Youre not alone. Lots of love dear

  2. 2Kathy Spiers

    Beautiful Kelly–thank you for sharing! I am certain it will help others–which is what I believe we are on the planet for–helping others struggle through the tough times in life. And there is nothing harder than loss of those we love. I’ve never lost a son but have a history of suicide on both sides of my family so have lost family members to suicide over the years. Thank you for being who you are and for sharing so much with us–you are so appreciated!!

  3. 3Anonymous

  4. 4Lynda

    Thank you, Kelly, for sharing your story. My son was 24 when he died, so I really appreciate your courage and willingness to help others. And, I love your art.

  5. 5Maggie Lockley

    Thank you Kelly, you are a marvel and I love you and your channel , I have not lost a Child thank goodness but I have lost 3 brothers and 2 grandbabies and I know it is hard to move on. you are doing great baby steps is good.

  6. 6Lani Le

    Love you Kelly!

  7. 7Dawn

    I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine. I only have one daughter and it would kill me. She just got her license too. Scarey but good time.
    I am new to mixed media and you have taught me so much. I love ya!
    Hey you mentioned mixed media xmas cards using old cards, can you do a video soon? I know it’s early but I want to learn how.
    I am no artist but thx to you and others I am inspired.
    I also have UC and so I totally get the chronic illness drama.
    Be well today Kel! Xoxo

  8. 8Anna Hamersley


  9. 9Sharon Rawson

    Thank you so much for YOU! You are an inspiration!

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